What is Active & Reflective Listening & 3 Examples of what that looks like.

Active listening has the ability to change relationships. Your relationships. It also has the ability to change the fabric of society. This is because these are such powerful tools that allow the listener to do just that. Listen. Empathize. Understand. The person speaking feels validated. The listener is responding not reacting. If you don’t know what active & reflective listening is, it is hearing the other person. It is validating the other person.

It is a having a conversation rather than an argument.

Here are some examples of active or reflective listening.

• Using “I” statements instead of “you” statements. 
  • Approaching an issue using you statements can often make someone feel attacked and they become defensive. Using I as much as possible can help create the opposite of that. When you speak from an I standpoint you talk about yourself and your own feelings.
• Ask clarifying and curious questions using “how” and “what” instead of “why.” 
  • Often times, asking why can create a sense of anxiety and stress because the person your asking may not know why; therefore, leading to immediate stress and heightens emotions that makes it difficult to remain calm and logical.
• Recounting what you hear the other person say then asking, “Is that correct?” 
  • This allows the other person to correct or modify anything that they were not intending to say that may have been interrupted by you differently. It is quite a powerful question, and can help the listener understand what filters they may be hearing with.